I said "good" when she asked how I was doing, and my face started burning. My ears swelled and started closing and the whole world muddled like a yawn. I could hear my throat constrict and the insides of my eyelids grew shards of glass and I blinked. I smiled. My eyes felt like burning... I'm not just happy... Strike that. What I meant to say was
I'm Just.
Not.
Happy.
I'm enthusiastically miserable. More than is acceptable. I'm unhappy enough - and have been for long enough - for my blandness and cold misery to call for a good tough love cleansing speech from a friend or worse - my mom. I can hear her saying "enough is enough, it's time to snap out of it and move on already" underneath her "dad and I really love you" speech. If she only knew how bad this feeling hurts, she'd understand. And she'd want to kick my ass.
"Well that's good to hear, darlin'."
Writing stuff about stuff that happened or will eventually happen.
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My Sites.
who?
What's your favorite tune from Experiments In Drowning?
topics
other stuff i read
- Blogging a Dead Horse <- To keep up with a good friend, Roy Mitchell-Cardenas
- Jade Day <- For freakin' out.
- McSweeney's <- To laugh my ass off.
- Mike Doughty <- To see the world better.
- Mute Math <- For rockin' out.
- Tech Crunch <- For geekin' out.
- Get Weird Turn Pro <-- for music.
- What To Wear During An Orange Alert <- for randomness.
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